Our free-spirited Kenzi girl!

I have to admit, I've had a really rough time with my little Kenzi Makae lately. She's just so much like me! I feel like I'm constantly butting heads with her, and find myself having to work hard to calm myself down on a daily basis. She's doing the lovely "test my mom just to see how far I can get" bit that is so common for 3 years olds. She's also been telling me that she can do whatever she wants and it doesn't matter what I say. She thinks she has complete control of me, and I'm starting to fear that that might actually be the case. I swear I'm not a lazy mom who doesn't follow through with threats for punishment, and I really do know how to discipline. It's like she honestly doesn't care what happens, she'll do it anyway.

Last week, my friend and neighbor Kira caught Kenz leaving our house out the front door with her little sister in tow. When Kira asked what she was doing, she said she was leaving while I took a nap and it was just fine. I was horrified. She has repeatedly been told not to open any doors without my permission. She could've run off and never been seen again!

When I cried and yelled at her and sent her to her room, she lied and said she never did any such thing. Once she was in her room, she screamed, spit, kicked the door, threw toys, and pounded on the door so hard I thought the whole house would come crashing down! She lies constantly and I just don't know what to do!

It's hard to hear myself say it, but I truly didn't want her around my house anymore. She's always pushing everyone's buttons, even when she's on our good side and we're giving her positive attention. I just wanted a break from her and be able to regain perspective on how things really should be.

So I sent her away. She's spending a few days at her biological father's house so I can have a break.

The result.....?

I have never missed her so much in my life.

I can't believe I wanted her gone, even for one day.

Ashlin walks around the house calling for her big sister who she can't find anywhere.

The house is quiet, and is actually rather boring.

There are no games of Pretend being played.

No singing of Hannah Montanna songs at the top of her lungs.

No jumping on the bed or couch or my scolding voice in return.

No constant gigglings of glee from teasing her younger sister.

No talking to no one in particular coming from her bedroom at the end of the hall.

No one to say "Mom, we forgot to say family prayer!" or "MOM!!!!!! I love you."

Yes, this child knows how to push my buttons hard enough to make me want to rip my hair out.

Sure, she annoys, complains, whines, demands, and antagonizes............................................

But above all, she LOVES.

So much more than any of that.

I need to keep that in my mind when she comes back home.

And I need to tell her just how much I missed her.

And how we love her so very, very much.